A combination you don't see every day.

And that combination would be "tasteful bondage-inspired detailed dress -- sedate" which is how the seller of this Modes Royale pattern describes it in her eBay listing. In fact, googling the phrase "tasteful bondage-inspired" got no hits (and once I post this it will get one hit, making it a googlewhack).

Well, I suppose if you want something tasteful, yet bondage-inspired, this would be your top choice. Obviously, it's the jaunty pocket square that shouts "tasteful!" while the straps would be the "bondage-inspired" part.

If I were going to make this (which I'm NOT, because I can't imagine anything that would look more ludicrous on me than this, but if I WERE) it would be in bright red with shiny patent straps and a heart- or lipstick-print pocket square. Because, you know, I wouldn't want it to be OBVIOUS or anything. Perhaps if I could find some material printed with little handcuffs? That would be hysterical.

What shoes to wear with this? The new Gucci platform ankle-straps, of course (I can't believe you had to ask):

They're so beautiful -- too bad I can't show proof that I'll be carried around on a palanquin, which I believe you have to furnish before you can buy a pair.